humor

Quotes about Socks

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For all those inveterate sock knitters out there (you know who you are!), I’ve updated my list of the thoughts of some well known people about their socks.

“One can never have enough socks.”

Albus Dumbledore

“I got up one morning and couldn’t find my socks, so I called Information. She said, “Hello, Information.” I said, “I can’t find my socks.” She said, “They’re behind the couch.” And they were!”

Steven Wright

“True love is like a pair of socks: you gotta have two and they’ve gotta match.”

Unknown

“Never put a sock in a toaster.”

Eddie Izzard

“I washed a sock. Then I put it in the dryer. When I took it out, it was gone.”

Rod Schmidt

“The average Southerner has the speech patterns of someone slipping in and out of consciousness. I can change my shoes and socks faster than most people in Mississippi can speak a sentence.”

Bill Bryson

“Never run in the rain with your socks on”

Unknown

“Both of your socks should always be the same color.  Or they should at least both be fairly dark”

Dave Barry

“Yes, sir. I’m a real Southern boy. I got a red neck, white socks, and Blue Ribbon beer.”

Jimmy Carter

“Choose your friends by their character and your socks by their color. Choosing your socks by their character makes no sense, and choosing your friends by their color is unthinkable.”

Unknown

“He may be president, but he still comes home and swipes my socks.”

Joseph P. Kennedy

“If it weren’t for women, men would still be wearing last week’s socks.”

Cynthia Nelms

“His socks compelled one’s attention without losing one’s respect”

H.H. Munro

“A man is about thirty-eight before he stockpiles enough socks to be able to get one matching pair”

Merrily Harpur

“Politicians who wear little tennis socks with the balls at the back should not be taken seriously.”

Mo Rocca
“Honey, have you ever seen a man knitting socks?” (yes, actually!)

Ezer Weisman

“I have reached an age where if someone tells me to wear socks, I don’t have to.”

Albert Einstein

“My socks DO match. They’re the same thickness.”

Steven Wright

Knitting as Art: Extreme Knitting, 1000 Strands

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What, you may ask, is Extreme Knitting? Apparently, it’s using gigantic (fence post size) wooden needles and hundreds and hundreds of yarn skeins. Other than creating an art piece, and a very large one at that, there seems to be no other practical use at this time. The leader of this new movement is Rachel John of England, who runs an organization called Extreme Textiles. The following video shows a record breaking knitting feat performed at the Unravel festival in 2006. It runs about 6 minutes. I wonder how much the final product weighs…..

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more about “Rachel John, Extreme Knitting, 1000 S…“, posted with vodpod

Christmas Humor: Twelve Tacky Sweaters

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Eleven pipers piping, twelve tacky sweaters…….

Not exactly how the song goes, but it’s become a perennial source of merriment – the over the top Christmas sweater, which now comes in endless variations.  I subscribe to iVillage UK News, and this morning they posted a slide show of some of the very best sweaters in the entire kingdom. Just a bit of Christmas humor!

More Quotes About Socks

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More words of wisdom for all you sock knitters out there.

“Psychoanalysis is for hysterical pathological cases, not for silly rich American women who should be learning how to darn socks.”   Sigmund Freud

“Women speak because they wish to speak, whereas a man speaks only when driven to speech by something outside himself-like, for instance, he can’t find any clean socks.”  Jean Kerr

“I don’t have a photograph, but you can have my footprints. They’re upstairs in my socks.”  Groucho Marks

“Never run in the rain with you’re socks on.”  Billie Joe Armstrong (of Green Day)

“If it weren’t for women, men would still be wearing last week’s socks.” Cynthia Nelms (artist)

“A man is about thirty-eight before he stockpiles enough socks to be able to get one matching pair.”  Merrily Harpur (artist)

“I washed a sock. Then I put it in the dryer. When I took it out, it was gone.” Rod Schmidt (monster truck driver)

“New socks. Two socks. Whose socks? Sue’s socks.”  Dr. Seuss in Fox in Socks

“He thought he could dry his socks in the microwave and he ended up training barefoot. The thing I am most glad about is that he has managed to dispel the tag that footballers are a bit stupid.”  Alex Ingelthorpe  (English football player)